Three in a relationship
by Anushka
Summary: Two in a relationship is hard enough, but three makes it even worse.
1. Default Chapter

**Disclaimer**: Not mine, never has been, never will be.

**A/N**: Two in a relationship is hard enough, but three makes it even worse.

**Pairing**: N/S

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**Three in a relationship**

_Grissom_

He watched her crouched down examining some evidence she had found laying on the floor of the room they were processing. As he watched he couldn't help but notice the way she would glance up once in a while and smile at the man standing in front of her. It hurt to know her smiles and glances were not directed at him. He watched Nick Stokes crouch down next to her, placing his hand softly on her back. It drove him crazy to watch another man touch her, he had to restrain the urge to go over to them and push away the hand which was touching her so intimately. In the eyes of strangers this gesture would seem so innocent, no meaning behind it, but he knew better.

They never announced their blossoming relationship to anyone, but everyone knew. Truth be told they were professionals at work, but it wasn't hard to notice they were an item. Finishing each others sentences, the innocent touches with more meaning behind them than anyone could know, the looks of understanding gave away the secret of their relationship. The secret they had never kept.

He kind of hoped they would have. Sometimes he thought it would have been easier for him not knowing. They never purposely displayed their affections towards each other in his presence, in his face, but that wasn't necessary. He had developed a radar which sensed the change of atmosphere when they were in the same room as him.

He found himself a lot in the same surroundings as them. He often wondered if it was his subconscious way of punishing himself as he knew the reason behind his misery was caused by himself and only him. He sometimes caught himself acting his feelings of frustrations out on them, but it only took one of her looks and he knew he had been doing it again.

He still loved her and he knew that she still cared for him. Nick still cared for him too, even though he hadn't given him much reason to. His feelings towards Nick did change. He had always looked at Nick as the innocent son of the team, but a son would never take away love from his father. His behavior towards Nick was like a father who disowned his son and Nick played the role of the son who keeps trying to restore the relationship.

His relationship with Sara never changed, even though she obviously wasn't waiting for him anymore. He realized he had let her wait for such a long time and she probably would still be waiting if it weren't for Nick sweeping her of her feet when she didn't expect it, when no one expected it and most of all when he didn't expect it.

He used to like to think he wasn't a man who held grudges, but nowadays he was kind of proud to know he actually did. An annoyed look on Nick's face when she would cast a worried look towards him satisfied his need to feel some kind of power over their relationship.

He wasn't ready to let her go just yet and Nick gave him the tool to hold on to her. It was comforting to know that for now their relationship existed out of three persons rather than two.


	2. Sara

**Three in a relationship**

_Sara_

She never knew something like this could happen to her. That someone would love her unconditionally. That someone would love her in her truest form with all the mistakes she had managed to make in her life. But he did. Nick Stokes did and he patiently showed her again and again what loving someone meant when insecurity got the better of her once again.

Sometimes she felt Nick expected something from her she couldn't possibly give him. Loving came so easily for him and it was so hard for her. She never truly loved Grissom. She knew that now, but her actions had told everyone surrounding her something else. Everyone including Nick and the object of her past affections.

Rationally she knew the problem could be easily solved, but she couldn't do it. She couldn't cut Grissom out of her life entirely, because it gave her a way out. A way out of something too good to be true. This new relationship, no matter how wonderful, was scaring her to death and it was comforting to know she could return to her old habits, which gave her a sense of safeness, if she wanted to. She knew it was insane, but she'd rather hurt herself than let anyone else hurt her.

She hated herself for doing this to Nick, to Grissom and also to herself. She knew what she wanted and who she wanted, but she couldn't bring herself to give herself totally to Nick. She needed to protect herself against someone she didn't need protection against. She wasn't giving up though and Nick knew she was working hard to get past all her insecurities.

She felt his arms surrounding her waist. This was as far as they would go at work, but in the beginning she had to learn to deal with Nick's almost constant affectionate behavior. It had been difficult to explain to him that she wasn't ashamed of their relationship. It was all so new to her and she had so much catching up to do. She knew she would get there, she ultimately, most likely would get there, eventually.

It felt good to be loved and it felt even better to love. She thought she could live on that feeling of total bliss if only she could get past the negativity which was desperately holding on to her heart. If only she could shake that feeling, the number of persons in this relationship would be reduced.


	3. Nick

**Three in a relationship**

_Nick_

God, he loved her. Had always loved her, he knew that now. The day she showed up at his doorstep after an especially gruesome case he knew there was no one in the world he could love more. The evidence of tears still gracing her face, she asked him if he was alright. Not quite looking at him, but at a distant point behind him, she told him she had noticed this case had been hard on him. Truth be told it had been hard on everyone and that's why he tried to hide his own feelings, but she had noticed. The one everyone thought had no social skills was standing here on his doorstep asking him if he was alright. The caring look in her eyes made him spill his deepest feelings to her, including a confession of love.

He always thought this first confession would be hardest, but how wrong he was. The hard part only just started with that confession. They both had their issues to deal with and he was sure they would be able to deal with them as long as they were together, but it was so hard sometimes. Reassuring her he would never hurt her intentionally seemed to be a never ending activity.

He tried to ignore the longing looks his supervisor was sending _his_ Sara. He tried harder to ignore the lack of her dismissal of these feelings their supervisor was still harboring for her. He knew she loved him, but he wondered if she still had feelings for Grissom. They had never gotten things out in the open and the fact she never even tried to make it really clear to him he should stop this behavior made him insecure. There was no room for his insecurity in this relationship as there was enough of hers.

He couldn't help himself when he noticed Grissom staring at her at the crime scene they were processing, he just had to touch her. To show Grissom she was his possession, but also to reassure himself. Standing up he pulled her close, inhaling her scent. It was as far he could go without causing her to pull back and at this moment he just couldn't deal with her rejection.

She had come a long way. At first she would pull back instantly when he would touch her at work. So different from how she was at home. At home she was funny, sweet, affectionate Sara. His Sara who would sit on his lap while watching TV. His Sara who claimed his side of the bed causing them to sleep on only one half of the bed, both being to stubborn to move to the other side, but also both loving the feel of the other pressed close to their own body. Slowly, ever so slowly she had started to bring a part of that Sara to work, a small part, but it was enough for him, at least for now.

Noticing Grissom was watching them, he realized he gave in to his ungrounded jealous feelings once again. If only he could get over those fears nagging in the back of his mind, he would truly have her. If only he could manage to do that they would only be together in this relationship.


End file.
